The Mid-Week Mumble: The Basement I — News — Off The Back — Daily Deals

The Mid-Week Mumble: The Basement I

Posted at Wed 17 Feb, at 08:00:00 in General By Tom A

OTB headquarters is situated in an old building in some town, somewhere. Our offices are actually on the upper level, which is good for several reasons…

Obviously, there’s a (marginally) better view to be seen from the top, which is nice. It also means we’re free of the annoying thudding from people stamping about upstairs – in fact, we’re the ones doing the stamping. But aside from the slightly better view and the fact that we’re the stampers, not the ‘stampees’, being at the top of the pile has one further advantage unique to our location.

As I said before, we’re in an older building. It’s all very charming and quirky, and the parts that are actually used are very nice and suitable for human presence. But there’s other parts which aren’t used much and that aren’t that nice.

I’m referring to the basement. Let me describe it to you…

Most mornings I’ll be greeted at the entrance to the building (and sometimes several metres from said entrance) by a foul-smelling odour. It’s kind of a mix of sulphur and sewage, with more than a hint of dampness thrown in. And it’s coming from the basement! (And sometimes, if I’m extra unlucky, somebody will have defecated nearby the previous night, too)

This smell is also amplified when it’s been raining, often travelling further and smelling stronger than usual. So we always pray for no rain.

And back to my point about why it’s good to be at the top – only the strongest smells from the rainiest days make it to the top of the stairs, so for the most part we’re contented, and overlook the bad smells that only bother us when we’re entering or exiting the building.

And for many months now I’ve been happy to not think about it. But recently I’ve been getting curious about just what exactly lurks in the basement. I’ve found some very cool things in basements in my time, let me tell you. But that’s a story for another day.

When I go down there, IF I go down there, I’ll probably just find an open drain, spiders and mice, maybe a few boxes thrown in for good measure? Maybe there’s a creepy dude who lives down there? Maybe there’s ghosts? Maybe there’s treasure? Maybe…oh, I’m getting a little too excitable now!

Nonetheless, something inside of me yearns to know what’s in the basement. If I can put up with the foul stench and the creepy crawlies for a moment then I’ll know for sure.

That’s it – I’m asking Robert for the key…

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Comments

Yes Tom!!!
Please grab that key from Robert and venture down there!
*She says from the safety of her laptop*

Been watching a few horror movies lately and there may just be a few more things than spiders and mice lurking down there. e.g. "Suspiria" retro movie or "Rec" for an attic version

But then again, there maybe long lost treasure that no one has dared to discover before!
Please let us know if you survive...oops I mean what you discover!

fairness

Posted at 17 Feb 2010 07:58 PM

take CSi with you they may be needed

Leelina

Posted at 18 Feb 2010 02:11 PM

Just make sure the door doesn't close and lock behind you if there's no way of opening it from the inside, maybe that's part of the reason for the current enjoyable odours you've mentioned.

AlmostMe

Posted at 18 Feb 2010 02:21 PM

DUDE are you off your rockers... I would not go down there allone. Never allone. You might not make it back:o lol but I really do hope your going to go with a buddie or a cell phone. but not a phone on the XT telecom network cause it will be days before help arrives or my be a week.

Playfulspiderlady

Posted at 19 Feb 2010 11:42 AM

Telecom.

Tom A

Posted at 19 Feb 2010 04:32 PM

What about using a walkie talkie from the OTB stockpile.
Oh, and a torch. I'm sure there'll be one there somewhere.

Guinevere

Posted at 20 Feb 2010 09:16 AM

Oh! and make sure the torch is one of those you just shake.

Cybergran

Posted at 21 Feb 2010 07:30 AM

Oh I love a mystery. Please, please go down to the basement and find out what's lurking there.If you like I'll come and hold your hand, but you will have to provide some masks to keep the smell away. I'll bring a cellphone and a torch,but no lunch cos it doesn't sound like a nice place for a picnic.

piglet22

Posted at 23 Feb 2010 12:28 AM

I enjoy a mystery but not when it comes to my password. Every time my password is rejected so I use the one sent to me, but next time that is rejected too.. What happens.

Do you have an Q&A column?

Ruru

Posted at 26 Feb 2010 09:01 AM

How do you make a purchase on this site. I logged on, hit the camera buy now & nothing happens

3bob1

Posted at 27 Feb 2010 08:25 AM

Seriously that would have been the first thing I did when I discovered an unexplored basement - dont me such a pussy! Grab a covered flame (non sparking torch or something!) grab a gas mask, enough food and water for 3 days, a change of clothes, a blanket... maybe some waders.... and GO FOR IT! Oh and, dont forget to tell someone where you are going in case you dont return by nightfall.... If you take a video camera, you can make your own blair witch project cheap spin off movie too, then make heaps of money!
Oh well, we are all with you in spirit, grab that key and JUST DO IT! Before I hunt you down and push you in there and lock the door behind you

Talitha

Posted at 08 Mar 2010 12:20 PM

Quick go get the key.If you discover ghosts down there then ring your local Spirtualist Chuch and get an excorist to bottle the ghosts and then you can make a couple of grand selling them on Trademe.Who knows there could be a skelton down there that to could net you a few 100 bucks on Trademe.So all in all it could be a very profitable time down in the basement for you.

Porsche guy

Posted at 17 Mar 2010 10:46 AM

I could sell you a lucky dip torch , works well in basements

jjl

Posted at 21 Mar 2010 12:45 PM

Sooooo...what happened? Or have I missed that post?

deedeejan

Posted at 24 Mar 2010 08:41 AM

Would love one will have to speak to bank manager

gavpaul

Posted at 28 Mar 2010 09:47 AM

Take a metal detector with you
plus a mask it may help. Don't get lost

gavpaul

Posted at 28 Mar 2010 09:53 AM

Hey, you must have staff under you? send one of them down with a wireless camera with sound to catch any screams or unsavoury images, oh and record it also, might be good for funniest home videos

ngutunuibill

Posted at 01 Apr 2010 09:10 AM

Don't forget to take a sharpened stake, a cross, and a bright light, just incase you find a coffin with a vampire layed out sleeping in it. Oh and a pint of blood,'and wear some good shoes to run in, incase the cross doesn't work.

Raydoc

Posted at 03 Apr 2010 01:52 PM

Personally i think i would just complain about the smell until something gets done about it rather than risk my life. Going down there maybe bad for your health in more ways than one...thing mould toxins etc etc

nakiproud

Posted at 09 Apr 2010 11:50 AM

Waitin I'm waiting
Waiting for you to get the key.
Anyway it's too late now that Tom A has left us.
Can someone else have the key?
How about we gang up on Robert, James and Dave and
send them down in the basement. Safety in numbers.

Cybergran

Posted at 10 Apr 2010 09:23 AM

Any updates?

moffattm

Posted at 30 Apr 2010 09:34 AM

Really disappointed. Received binoculars today and they are (to put it in a word) crap!! cheap nasty junk. No way they were worth over the $100 to start with and they certainly werent worth the money we did pay. Very annoyed with myself for falling into the trap actually. Pay peanuts get monkeys is dead right!!

patsym

Posted at 03 May 2010 02:34 PM